Too many people making too many problems

Song Of The Moment

Election time is upon us again, apparently. There is alot of talk about it at work..."Christmas Election's going to spoil the holidays" is all that I hear now Isn't an election supposed to generate thoughts of "What can you do for me in the gov't?", not "Oh man! Why are you guys holding an election during Christmas?" I have YET to hear a members givings or what they can do for me if elected...only backstabbing. I was going to vote this year, now...I'm not too sure I will

Voting is a human right, the right to have someone appointed into a place of power and to make decisions that will, ultimately, affect the way we live. Not once have I voted and not been in favor of the persons standings...this year I have no one to favour. Why should I vote for someone if they are slandering someone else? And, as I said before, I haven't heard anything good yet from ANY candidate, no "I'll increase wages" or "I'll do something about the debt" or "Hell, I'll juggle fire-balls while whistling yankeedoodle". Personally, if I have to ask what you can do for this country, YOU aren't the person I am going to vote for. Thanks.

Its no wonder half the world is at war, isn't it? No one wants to make a difference: all we want to do now is muscle our way into power so we can relax with the big, fat paycheque that comes with the position. All good and fine I suppose....*I'd* do the same, if *I* were a slimy, political character, the sort that has no morals or scruples, the kind that lies somewhere inbetween mud-puddle scum and lawyers in the food chain. But I am not. *I* would NOT make for a good member of parliment. I know that I am not though. I think most of the candidates running should realize this about themselves and stop messing the rest of us around, while they get fat off of our short-comings.

Thats just the thoughts of one disgruntled non-voter though.





Ciao

its something unpredictable

Song Of The Moment

I am a big Stephen King fan...well, more or less. I'm not a fanatic, but I think his ideas are awesome. Just watched "The Langoliers" the other night and was reminded of his unique "thought processes".

First off, I'll give you some inside information on this movie...nothing special when it comes to cinematography, looks like it was "Made for TV" all the way. Acting can be lame in MANY spots and the "Special FX" at the end are nothing compared to todays standards. Ok, with *that* out of the way, let me fill you in on the guts of the movie.

The Langoliers is basically "What if Back To The Future was a horror movie?" Thats right, time travel...but with some interesting twists. Ever since Mr Speilberg turned Mr. Fox into a bigger star then he already was, people have had the idea that time travel was a realistic idea, that you could go back and see people and things that happened long ago. Well, what if "time" disappears after it happens, leaving nothing in its wake but a dead world, waiting to disappear? Would you really want to go back to 1955, only to see nothingness...darkness...a world where nothing exists anymore? This is how it is though, time is a monster that either hunts you down, runs beside you, teeth gnashing at your sides...or waits for you up ahead, with its claws out...so you better make the best of the run you have, 'cause there ain't much waiting for you at the finish line...

In the movie, most of the main characters have had something "in the past" that haunts them. .. or do they? Have they just stopped moving through time normally, wanting to rest in that time that haunts them because the time they are moving through is too painful for them? Some of them, yes, and when time goes by without you, you are left with a dead world to live in. *This* is why you can't live in the past, there's nothing there for you!...We all learn this in different ways, I suppose though, I know I have...

Anyways, thats my thoughts for the night. Time to get off the pc and do something productive.






Ciao

For though they may be parted there is still a chance that they will see

Song Of The Moment

So, I was finishing the "unpacking" process...you know, where you *think* everything is put away but there's still that box in the corner that you have been using as an end table...*that* sort of thing....anyways, I was unpacking one of those boxes and came across several "love letters" from an old girlfriend of mine. Now, usually, I get melancholy very easily....such was the case with these. Re-reading the words of a lost-love is always hard....figuring out "what to do with them now" is even tougher.

I kind of realize I cannot just throw them away, seeing as how, at one point, they were meaningful. Thinking of this though reminds me of a convo I had had with an old love, when she had come across my "box of memories". You see, every guy has a shoebox....no really, its true! Now what the shoebox looks like is always different, but the fact that they have one to keep all those things that make them who they are remains the same. Mine is an old shoebox from the shoes I bought for my wedding, actually. Anyways, upon discovering it and going through it, she found old love letters from girls I had known and was wondering why I had kept them. I didn't really know how to answer her at the time, other then to tell her that "they meant something at the time and to throw them out when the love was gone meant that I was ignoring those times altogether". This troubled her, as it should....I loved "her", not this woman from the past, right?

Quick switch to present day

I now have letters from this woman, whom was wondering why I kept letters from another woman. Do I "keep them in my box of memories for another love to find" or do I dispose of them and forget that those times ever happened? Now, I realize that tossing out the actual material does not mean I am throwing out those memories, but, If I don't need to forget those times, why would I throw out the evidence of them? Shouldn't I respect the owner of these things properly? ... I have decided to mail them back to her. I will keep the memories where only *I* can see them...she can have the actual material to do with as she pleases. Sure, this sounds kinda mean, sending an "old love" old love letters (mean yet ironic)....but, really, its not meant that way. I am a stickler for keeping things in its place...and these things have no real place with me now, do they?

Maybe she will remember the question posed and realize the answer given....maybe....






Ciao

don't let the sound of your own wheels drive ya crazy

Song Of The Moment

Where to start....where to start..., well, I'm all moved in ... place is looking really good ... and I'm starting to notice those *little things* I forgot to take with me when I packed, such as dish cloths (damn dishes), extension cords (damn electronic applicances) and garbage cans (damn...uh...garbage??) In any case, its nice to be back on my own again. Upstairs neighbours are getting a nice "thank you" cake tomorrow for the cups of sugar borrowed the first few days (and to whomever left the coffee and the whitener in a bag on the doorknob yesterday, thanks!)

A friend of mine commented on an earlier blog that I should "live in the moment and see life as a journey, not a destination". Very true words. Last night, a co-worker gave me a kitten. Cute little thing too, meows like NO tomorrow .... even though, it was nice to come home and relax, watch some tv and just watch the kitten play. Nothing soothes the nerves more then watching kittens at play I have found. THATS taking things in the moment. I wasn't worried about what the next paycheque would give me, I wasn't worried about whether my little girl would do well at school (even though its always a concern)...all I was, was at peace with everything. I highly recommend it...just turn off that switch that controls all your stress levers and R-E-L-A-X!

Still, even though I spent time to "rejuvenate" the nerves, I crave some excitement (Thanks to Misses Mystery-Poster for intriguing my intrest in this blog just recently, btw)...and soon, I am going to have to bust out and do something fun...ppfftt, good luck being the start of winter and all. Maybe after I get my wheels (NEXT CHEQUE HOPEFULLY!!), I'll be more able to get out there and enjoy something that is not "kittie-petting" related. Til then, I guess I'll just be here, hanging around......










Ciao

are you pacified?

Song Of The Moment

Thing about being poor, you never realize you ARE poor unless you are needy in the first place. A long time ago, a very wise man told me the difference between "wants and needs", and that wisdom has stuck with me til now.

"Needs are the things that you 'need' to survive, like food, shelter, clothing...everything else is just a want, regardless of how much it means to you."

Right now, I have shelter, clothing and food. My "wanting" a truck is just that...a want. It isn't neccassary for survival. Hell, I survived long enough without one, haven't I? So, do I define myself by my material goods or by how I act in Life? Thats a no-brainer. I have alot in Life, not just "things", I have had adventures, I have my memories....I have family and friends...and no one can take those things away from me. Eventually, I will have my truck, my paid education and my house .. but until then, I am happy for all that I have gained along the way ... AND, as well, I have "learned" from all that I have lost along the way.

That being said, Friday night, day off again...think I'll go visit my family and relax. Tomorrow, I move more things into my new place and I want to enjoy my night while it is still young.






Ciao

when you're on your own

Song Of The Moment

Well, the lights get hooked up in the new place today. Half my stuff is moved in (couch, beds, bookcase etc.) .. the other half is still in storage though til this weekend. SO, I haven't really spent an actual "night" there yet. Tonight though, going to pack up a few neccessities and take it down. Tonight, I will be living in Cornwall.

Work is going awesome too...overtime up the ol' ying yang. Worked 10 hour shifts the past 3 days. With overtime pay being 13 bucks an hour?...ya, taking FULL advantage of THAT! Now that I am into a new place, my next goal is buying a vehicle. Haven't decided on what exactly....was thinking of a truck, only because of all the "sorry, can't help ya's" I was getting when I was moving into this place...but that decisions' not based on anything but bad moods. A truck would come in handy....more useful for hauling things and more dependable for getting around in the winter. I HAVE decided that it won't be a used one either. The way I see it, a used truck at 500 *might last* for 3 - 4 months before the inevitable breakdown. If I spend that 500 on a down payment on a new one, I get more reliability, longer life AND less chance of the "Can I get a boost?" calls at 7 in the morning.

Other then that?...things are going ok, I figure. Trying to concentrate on moving forward, which means not looking back. Reflecting on the past always gets me stuck in a rut...and I can't afford to do that at this point. No self-pity acts, no "victim" roles being played...just another Canadian guy trying to make something out of this life.






Ciao

have you been half asleep? have you heard voices? I hear them calling my name....

Song Of The Moment

Well, today is the day! Just paid rent and I am NOW officially located in Cornwall!! *can I get an amen?* AND, I will also have electricity!!!.....well, lights "will be" hooked up on Tuesday....4 days with no lights is better then 2 weeks. And now, I can relax in the fact of being on my own again.

Been very VERY independant the past few years...and now that part of me is seeping out all the more. When asked if I wanted a drive today to hook up the lights, I said "No"...only because *I* wanted to do this "on my own"....not to be rude, but I have depended on others in the past and, even though they have all offered in the "best intentions", not all of the offers have come through as said. With that in mind, I now depend on myself only. If others offer to help, thats great!!...but I will always have a back-up plan, just in case.

So now, friday night....day off from work....new place....I think I can afford to relax for the evening, maybe go downtown and shoot some pool. Or go visiting my "long-lost relatives". Either case, this will be the last post I will make from someone else's computer. Future posts will either be from work or when I get the net hooked up at the "new place"....oh, did I mention I JUST got a new place? HAH!! Sorry, gloating is fun, isn't it?




Ciao

for the whole world to read

Song Of The Moment

Another 3 days and I'm *officially* re-located to my new 2 bedroom place, conveniently close to work & the little one. Waiting this out has been rough, and in the process I have re-evaluated the meaning of things, such as "home" for instance.

Home is NOT always where the heart is, although that is what the line says. Home IS where you go when the day is done. Home is where you lay your head down and rest for the coming of the new day. Home is what you are proud of and endure to keep yours, both in possession AND in cleanliness. Home is also where you are safe from Life's troubles and where others can feel comfortable about themselves.

In the past few years, I have had several homes, ranging from bachelor pads to 2 bedroom deals ... right up to houses. The size does not matter..its how it fits into and more enables your life to function that matters. The place I am moving into is a 2 bedroom because I have a little girl who likes to come over. It *is* bigger then my last place, in that it HAS a dining room *woohoo*. AND its close enough to work for me to walk. All things that ensure I am sane and productive.

Its been a wait, and even though, once I get first months rent secured, I am still going to be going 2 weeks with no lights? *ACK*, it will be well worth it in the end. ... finally, on my own again.....

btw : pic was taken from my FIRST place in Morell, way back in 1993


Ciao