Thursday, September 21, 2006

halfway between the gutter and the stars

Song Of The Moment

I have been oficially promoted at work. One more rung up the ladder of "importance"....but *that* is not the reason I am posting (even though it IS a pretty neat event in The life).

The Fatboy Slim song posted here has been somehow graphed onto the memory of being promoted. I can not decide whether it is because I have been listening to it more often the past week OR because of the wordings involved in the tune "Don't be shocked by the tone of my voice....check out my new weapon, weapon of choice". In any case, when I hear it now and in the future, I will be reminded of this time.

Thats basically what I am writing about today. The mental impressions music has on us. The memories it instills, the impressions it leaves on us. Its much easier to explain through example here then trying to word it correctly, so, lets just hit next song on the ipod and see what I remember.

Stone Cold Crazy - Metallica. Yeah man. I'm brought back to my nephews house. Before him and his woman broke up. He's watching WWF and the kids are cranking because its 11 PM and they are still up. As the volume of the room gets louder, with the kids crying and the tv getting turned up, his eyes get all weird and twisted. "FOR FUCK SAKES!" he yells and stomps out of the house. Yeah,...he pays child support now and still has the twisted look in his eyes, but its slowly fading.

Only Women Bleed - Alice Cooper. I'm driving down the Canavoy road, dirt clouds rising behind the Cavalier, as I race home from work. Its Christmas Eve and when we exchange our early Xmas presents, she isn't happy with the painting supplies and easel I got her, saying "I don't know her anymore".

Can't Get High - Slowcoaster. Instantly at Melons in downtown Ch'Town, now closed, having a drink with my then boss and friend. Funky music playing from the upstairs level and a pool table waiting inside. Good times....

Mad World - Gary Jules. Ultimately end up thinking of a bud of mine and how his Life is so dark and scary, seemingly. Darkness that has teeth and pain.

Well, you get the idea. Music plays such an important part in our lives and yet we steal it, copy it and plagerize it endlessly. Not really taken for granted but more used up.

Saturday, September 09, 2006

There's so many strange places I'd like to be but none of them permanently

Song Of The Moment

As much as I want to listen to jaded and rage-filled music to drown out the lonliness of being single, it just doesn't work. Can't fight against a fact of Life, an inevitability. I guess one of the hardest things to do, from the time you are thrust into social resoning to the time your reasoning is taken away from you, is to accept things as they are.

Being alone is liveable if you have never had anyone close to you. Hermits aren't crazy...they are just living the single life to the max, really. But after leaning on too many ledges, only to have them crumble, fall apart or just disappear, you learn not to trust the leaning post. You stand straight-up more, your legs get tired alot and you stop trusting freely.

On the other hand, you want to see the other side of the fence again. You want to be where the suns rises and sets and everything is set and real. That place is not here though. And as much as I'd like to walk back into the normalacy of "being with someone", pattern tells me that it does not last and instict tells me I would lose whatever I have right now.







Ciao