Wednesday, March 29, 2006

And my scars remind me that the Past is real

Song Of The Moment

Recently, I have been thinking about my Life (ok, thats a lie..everyone thinks about their Life more or less every day) and I have come to realize all that I have done. Sometimes, it helps to search your heart and pick out those few shining moments of accomplishment and bask in the glory of them. It helps you realize who you *really* are....

Of all the things I have done, the one single thing I take pride in the most is being a Father to my little girl, Amber Jane. Through the hard times when my wife and I split up, I always tried my *hardest* to do things with her in mind. I am not perfect and I'll be the last person to say I did everything right, but, I believe I can say that my little girl loves her daddy and looks up to him for help and support. *This*, by far, is the most uplifting thing in my Life, being able to mould a childs future with just my actions as a guideline.

I try to teach her about love by showing her that I can love and how nice an emotion it can be.
I teach her about right and wrong by the decisions I make on a daily basis.
I teach her about honesty by being open with her about everything (to a point).
Most of all, I show her that Family is the roots that she can stand on when she is uncertain as to whom she is. If she needs something or is in trouble, she need only call on me and I will do my best to help. Thats what Family is for afterall.


I remember, after my wife left, I was introduced to the computer and the internet...and I am proud to say that, the things I have done online and the friends I have made along the way DESERVE a mention in my "List of Accomplishments". I have discovered a whole new side of me, one that likes to entertain, one that creates things for other peoples enjoyment, and one that holds dear the companionship of those few people he has spilled his heart and soul out to on the keyboard.
Another one of my accomplishments are the romantic relationships I have had. I haven't found Misses Right yet...but I know that the women I have had feelings for, I have shown them the "true me", not some made-up person trying to impress whomever. I have always tried to be "me" when I start to like someone and that is a true accomplishment in a world of liars, cheaters and players.


All for all, my Life has been rather eventful and adventurous. I have gained so much that its hard to imagine the downfalls of it all. And thats the way I like it. If you think about only what you have done wrong, you will cheat yourself and all around you of your true inner beauty and strengths. And that is what Life is all about...being you, LIKING you .... and taking pride in yourself.


Ciao


Originally Posted September 08th, 2005

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think I'm going to puke :s

Fiend said...

Don't worry...my blogging is cycled.

Another 2 or 3 "mush&gush/melacholic" posts and I'll be right back to posting about cheese or the contents of my pockets again!!

Unknown said...

Hey man... if it's any consolation to you... you are a great friend and a great dad too.

Fiend said...

Hey, I'm not looking down on Life. Completely the opposite!

My Life has been an adventure, plain and simple. I have been a PotMaker, a Building Supervisor, a lowly night worker, a delivery driver, a step-dad (almost) and a tech support junkie.

I have had friends come and friends go. I have been the "other man", the "one-night stand" and the "summer romance". I have seen things and experienced Life's events. When I walk out the door, I look up and see nothing but sky.

Yeah, sounds kinda lame but its true. I am free. No boundaries. The only limit is what *I* limit.





Now back to your regularily scheduled programming, already in progress....

Unknown said...

That is so true... when I recover from my current loss of relationship, I hope to be able to look up and see all that is good in the world.