Not with a bang or a sigh. Nothing will mark its coming. It happens slowly; is happening as you read this. Pieces get lost, misplaced and replaced over time, until the puzzle is finished and gone at the same time.
But my eyes are still open, watching it all fly away. Where is my complacent smile? When did the laughter stop? How did all this crap get stuffed into this tiny place so quickly? ... have to breathe. The pain by my eyes will stop once I close them, but the pain behind my eyes can still be seen.
Reality blurs. Momentary sense of my mortality. Will anyone want my memory, like all the other treasures I have lost? The temporary darkness that rules my thoughts tells me No. With no one to argue the point, why should I think it a lie?
Still, with all this blatant thievery, I try to find something to laugh at, to bring a partial warmth to the small place left inside. Feeling this, the pain and the lie of the smile I try to show, means I still own this part of me, no one has stolen it from me .... yet.
Ciao
2 comments:
My world, as I know it, ended last night. To day I am aimlessly wandering in my mind. Is my head going to blow off? Can I take any more? Nope I have to work, hear voices prattling on and on. I make decisions, give direction, appear fucking normal. Now I am home and wondering where I am going, how can I survive. There is no answer. For some reason unknown I come to this blog and read. Fuck someone does know what is happening to me. The temporary darkness ruling my thoughts tell me there is another cyber soul out there that can give me comfort........... Yes he did do that
I can't think of one thing that i did today that actually made a difference, in the definition of "That was worth it", but, knowing that my inane randomness has helped another makes the day worthwhile.
Thanx bro.
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